Of Oceans and the Sea

When I was a little girl living on a Caribbean Island surrounded by the sea, I never once went for a swim. I had driven by the Caribbean Sea and dreamt of dipping into it many times but it didn’t happen until I went on a return trip there with my parents at ten years old. We drove to an Island beach with Mr. Spence. He had a car and suggested that we go there when we went on holiday. He packed us in his car and we brought our swim suits along. I skipped along the sand , felt it between my toes and sat in the shallow waters edge looking at the beautiful blue of the sea. I was all alone at once and it was just me and the sand and the sea. I relaxed into a state of ultra-consciousness when I looked intensely at the sand and the sun spiraling off of the waves. My only companion was the sound of the waves; everyone else so caught up in setting up chairs and towels that no one paid any attention to me.

Suddenly I felt a new sense of power flow from my body and into the sand; trying to anchor me to the shore. The waves came to the shore and broke my grip on the sand as it pulled me into the water;  under and above it. I could feel the warmth of the water hugging me, I could smell and taste the saltiness of the sea , I was witness to the fullness of its color. I could’ve sworn that the sea was whispering, “Come to me” and I felt peaceful and fully a part of the universe. I felt wanted; really wanted for the first time.  I began where the sea  started and neither me nor the sea had an ending . I could barely see the shoreline, the sea had begun to yank my little body down into its depths. I just felt at home,  despite the sharp waves slashing into me and my lungs slowly inflating with liquid. It must have been for a longer time than I thought but the water did not take me that day. It was rather kind to me and one of the last big waves placed me right back near the shoreline. I dug my fingers into the sand and had to pull my body out of the water as it kept trying to pull me back.  As I sat on the shore again I felt  my heart pull me back to the sea but it was already time to go. My mother and father ended up buying the property, they left caretakers in charge but they never looked after the property and so this beach languished into a home for squatters. I could have been one of the squatters on that beach had I been there. But that is not the lovely place where I squatted. When I begin to think of that I pop out of it and into my vivid experiences from which all good things seem to emerge; sometimes slowly but surely.

I have always remembered the feeling of that very vivid experience of being loved and wanted by a sea of salty blue water. There were secrets of life in the water and the fish that brushed my legs seemed to know what those secrets were. The sea knows itself and it knows what it wants to do. I remembered when we went o church the pastor said that that “the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.”(Genesis 1:2)  God divided the heavens from the earth and gathered the water together which was called the Seas and the waters that surrounded the earth  were abundant with life and living creatures. It is all in the creation stories in Genesis and I could really feel the living earth in my bones when sitting on that shore.

You needn’t be religious to have an experience like this, all you need is to pursue that vivid feeling you get when you reminisce. I have always believed in memory’s power  to improve someone’s mentality. I remember watching Nature show and I saw what looked like millions of young hatchling sea turtles off the coast of Australia just emerging from their shells. The mothers  had long since laid their eggs and had already made their way back out to sea leaving the young hatchlings to emerge and fend for life on their own. As they moved across the sand toward the water, sea birds flew in for a healthy meal, crabs came out of the ground to feed and only a few hatchlings made it into the water. Even then there were sharks waiting to devour them  and only a few lucky ones made it far enough to flow away from danger on waves of water.

I often feel like I am fighting like those little hatchling sea turtles trying to make my way across the sand, and sometimes I become the little girl calling to the water to save me.  The water saved the baby turtles with its powerful waves just as it did with me. It put me back safely on the shore not ready to claim me yet. Many of the young turtles shall grow and come back to their place of birth to lay more eggs one day just as I come back to the sea again and again in my mind. I haven’t actually been back many times but I have gone there vividly and consciously and consistently  in my mind. I have fully embraced the feeling and like the little hatchling that floated the waves in safety to fulfill their purpose in life.  I have to believe that I was put here to fulfill my purpose too even in my old age.  So I ride the wave and I suggest that we all have some kind of hidden experience that we can concentrate deeply on  and make that our wave. If you don’t have one;  you can certainly create one in your mind and go to that place when you need to. You do not need to meditate but to concentrate deeply on that picture and that feeling with all of your senses. You will remember everything so vividly that you will never forget.  My mother always said to fight for life and at the rightful end of hers she asked if it was okay to give up the fight now.  She had fought the good fight and lived a good life so there was no longer any reason for her to be denied her rightful place in the Universe.  She was merely going to be as free as she was before she was born. In the time between, we fight, strongly, vividly , purposefully and fulfilled. That is the true ultra-conscious experience.

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